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It's A Single Mom Thing
Welcome to “It's A Single Mom Thing,” the show for single moms by single moms, hosted by Sherry Chandler.
Being a solo momma and present parent is hard work, and losing focus is easy when you forget your faith. The good news is you are not alone. You were singled out this season, and together, we can work on what’s not working for you—finding Christ in the crisis! Whether you’re tuning in early in the morning or late at night, I’m here for you, momma.
This podcast is your go-to space for navigating life as a single mom with faith, fun, and a fresh perspective. We'll cover everything from mastering a single-mom success mindset and budgeting like a boss to prioritizing self-care and raising resilient kids. We’ll share time management hacks, parenting perspectives, co-parenting challenges, and how to find joy and laugh again. Together, we’ll move from surviving to thriving in every season of single motherhood.
Be encouraged. Get inspired. You can do this, momma.
Each Monday, join me for practical advice, relatable stories, and uplifting conversations as we walk this journey from solo momma to solo momma. I promise not to take too much of your time, and I’m so grateful you’re spending it with me.
It may be a single mom thing, but it doesn’t have to be the "single thing" that stops you!
It's A Single Mom Thing
Forgive and Flourish: What Letting Go Gives Back
Feeling weighed down by past hurt, anger, or betrayal? In this powerful episode of It’s a Single Mom Thing, host Sherry Chandler unpacks the truth about forgiveness—what it really means, why it’s so hard, and how letting go can set you and your family free. With fierce faith and honest storytelling, Sherry shares what unforgiveness costs us—peace, healing, energy—and how it often gives the enemy a foothold in our lives.
You’ll learn how to:
✅ Identify hidden areas of unforgiveness
✅ Break generational patterns by “faithing it forward”
✅ Teach forgiveness to your kids (even littles and teens!) through practical conversations, color tools, and in-the-moment prayer
✅ Take real steps toward releasing what’s been festering so you can flourish
Whether you're dealing with a co-parent, a friend, yourself, or even God—this episode offers real talk, biblical truth, and spiritual tools that can transform your heart and home.
Mentioned in this episode:
– Ephesians 4:27
– Family forgiveness dinner table questions
– Color-coded emotion tool for kids
– Pocket prayers for littles and tough teens
– 24/7 prayer line: 855-822-PRAY
Subscribe, share, and join the conversation—because forgiveness isn't just for them, it's for you.
#Forgiveness #SingleMomPodcast #FaithHealing #ParentingWithGrace #LetGoAndGrow #ItsASingleMomThing
It's a Single Mom Thing, Not the Single Thing That Stops You!
Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for single moms by single moms. This is Sherri, your host, and I am happy you are here today. Remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Welcome back to another episode of it's a Single Mom Thing, where we walk and talk our tough times out with fierce faith, never letting this single season stop us. I'm your host, sherri, and today we're diving into one of the most freeing yet most challenging truths forgiveness. Let's call this episode Forgive and Flourish. What Letting Go Gives Back.
Speaker 1:Because, listen, while unforgiveness might feel like protection, it's really a prison girl. So, before we get started, I need you to forgive me. Forgive me for not being here with you last Monday. I totally forgot that I was going to be out of town. That is my bad. So, moving on, are you ready to get on board with a new train of thought what unforgiveness takes from you? We're going to start right there. So, ladies, as I like to say, let's flip the script right away on this.
Speaker 1:Unforgiveness doesn't give anything, but it certainly takes a lot. Now, from my experience, I have found this. I have found that unforgiveness does a few things. It doesn't give you control, it actually takes your peace. Unforgiveness doesn't protect you, it prevents you from healing. Unforgiveness also doesn't shield your heart, it shackles it. Sis, listen, unforgiveness won't light your fire, it'll burn you out. It's an emotional debt kind of like, with a compounding interest, though.
Speaker 1:So have you ever taken notice of what it feels like? That bitterness that bubbles underneath your breath, anxiety in certain conversations, anger that erupts in places it doesn't belong, or even that numbness towards the people or persons who need your tenderness? There it is. So where does it show up? How about in relationships? As a short fuse, or even a distant heart? How about even in your parenting? Oh yes, in the form of overcompensating or under connecting. Even it shows up in your spiritual walk, by staying busy but feeling blocked. And have you ever thought about why is it we do that? We fill our calendars with everything under the sun, right, like Bible study, school activities, a new workout plan, maybe even a new boo, reorganizing the pantry again, scrolling social, like it's our job Anything, just anything, to stay and keep moving, so we don't have to sit still with what's really going on. It's like we think if we just do enough, we won't have to feel too much. That might hurt someone right there. But busyness, it isn't healing, listen, it's just noise and a very crowded heart. And here's the hard part that I have found Sometimes unforgiveness it is hidden.
Speaker 1:It's not always the usual suspect, like the ex or your parents. It could be towards yourself, oh yes, in the form of guilt or shame. You just can't shake, even towards God, over something you felt he could have stopped, or even and you may not see this one coming even your kids, for what you feel you missed, lost or endured. Now that's a tough one. Here's a hard truth for us to consider. We can't flourish while holding on to what's festering. I know that's good.
Speaker 1:Unforgiveness as a foothold. Have you ever had those moments where you felt like you lost your footing, slipped or even fell without not knowing what you tripped over? Sometimes that unseen tripwire is unforgiveness. It's like a giant bit of root just under the surface, one you didn't realize was still there, ready to snare you and throw you off course. And even worse, it gives the enemy access.
Speaker 1:You see, unforgiveness isn't just a heart issue. It's a foothold and a stepstool, a crack in the door that lets in chaos and confusion. Ephesians 4.27 even goes as far as to warn us, and I quote do not give the devil a foothold. And unforgiveness, ladies, listen, it is one of the easiest footholds he uses. Why? Because it one, keeps you stuck in the past. Two, it fuels lies like, for example, they don't deserve it or I'll never get over this. Three, it also distracts you from the healing God wants to do in you and not just around you.
Speaker 1:You see, bitterness, let's think of it this way. Bitterness is a bait and the enemy is counting on you to bite. So, listen, I think we need to take that worm, that bait, off the hook, because here's the good news, and I got lots of it Forgiveness shuts that door, it severs the stronghold, it roots out the tripwire and it clears the path for healing and peace. Who doesn't need some of that? Isn't that, honestly? Let's think about it. Isn't that, honestly, what we are really after? Maybe not for them, the other person right now, but for you and even your kids.
Speaker 1:Listen, I know forgiveness isn't the thing we want to do. I get it totally, but it should be the thing we choose to do to free our families and their future. So hear me out. You could be the hero or the shero in your family right now, the one who breaks the pattern, ends the cycle and faiths it forward. So why would you want to do that, you may be asking yourself. Well, here's what forgiveness gives back.
Speaker 1:Forgiveness isn't about being okay with what happened. Some of you listening have walked through some deep trauma things done to you that should never have happened and can't be undone. Some wounds require stitches and, yes, they leave scars, but unforgiveness, it, keeps those wounds wide open. So hear me clearly Forgiveness is not saying it was okay. It's choosing to no longer let it have power over you, and I'm going to say that again it's choosing to no longer let it have what Power over you. So if it no longer has power over you, then what does forgiveness give in return? How about your peace back, your power, back your identity back, not as a victim but as a victor, your joy, freedom and wholeness? And how about some clarity of thought? I would like some of that.
Speaker 1:Yes, and let's be real, forgiving doesn't mean being buddies with the offender. In no way am I suggesting that. So let's be clear. But let's also be clear about this. Boundaries are biblical. Forgiveness is about release, not let me say it right reconciliation. There we go.
Speaker 1:So let's take the bait off the hook and release the fish that is on, throw it back in the water and then reel in your line, girl, and then, when you forgive even before you feel like it, because you're not going to always feel like you want to do this this is what it does. It creates a space for God to do what only he can do Heal. That's a yes and an amen. So, okay, how do we do this when we don't want to? Well, here are some practical ways that I have found to forgive and listen. You don't need to feel it to do it. Faith isn't a feeling, and neither is forgiveness, despite what we may believe. So here are some practical steps.
Speaker 1:I have found in my own life that you too can take One, name it and like this who or what do you need to forgive? Think about that Now. Remember also that some things may be hidden, so you may need to pray about this, allowing God to shine a light on what is not seen or in plain view. Then, two, once you've named it, write it down, journal your hurt and then cross it out and write I quote I release this in Jesus name out and write, I quote, I release this in Jesus name. Then, number three pray through it, daily breath prayer. Like God, I give you what I cannot carry.
Speaker 1:Four speak it aloud like this Say I don't know, I choose to forgive, and then fill in the blank for blank offense. Even if it hurt, I will not let it harden me. And then five bless it instead of bash it like a pinata. Ask God to bless them. Yep, even them. Now, I know this last one feels completely counterintuitive, but remember, god's ways are not our ways right. And here's the kicker Blessing them just might bless you too. So I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to double dog, dare you Yep, I said it to write down the date in your journal when you ask God to bless that person. Then be on the lookout, watch how he moves, because when you pay attention with intention, you just might get a front row seat to see how God shows up. And when he does go back to that journal, highlight it, circle it, draw stars around it. Let it become a signpost, a bold reminder of where God has been faithful.
Speaker 1:When you gave a little forgiveness, teaching forgiveness at the table. Now, forgiveness shouldn't just be something you practice, it should be something you pass on. Let's be the generation that raises kids who learn early how to release, not rehearse, their pain. That, my friend, is some real head start education. So here's how to get the conversation going, but first, phones down, no swiping, scrolling or side texting. Okay, sister and you, mama, be present at the dinner table like it's sacred, because it is.
Speaker 1:Start with a simple, open-hearted question like did anything happen at school or with a friend this week that made you feel sad, left out or mad? For example, did someone leave you out at recess or say something mean? Two, is there anyone you're still upset with, maybe a teacher, a classmate or even me? Here's another question how do you know the difference between wanting something to be made right and just wanting to get back at someone? This is going to help them understand justice versus revenge. For example, you can say at the table okay, let's say someone at school broke your favorite pencil on purpose, wanting them to say sorry, or tell the teacher that's wanting it to be made right. Them to say sorry, or tell the teacher that's wanting it to be made right, but if you decide to break their pencil later just to get even now, that's revenge. One brings healing and the other brings more hurt. Then you can follow up that thought or example with a so what do you think Jesus would want us to do and how could we handle it differently next time? Then you can also ask questions like okay, why do you think forgiving someone is hard, but what can it do for our hearts? Now, this might be a little hard for them, so let's, let's explore this a little. So this question is what it's going to do. It's going to allow them to explore how forgiveness can make them feel lighter, freer, or even the hurt that was so big.
Speaker 1:Now, for younger kids, who might not have words yet, you could try a color feelings activity. You could say let's play a color game. If your heart feels happy, what color would it be? What about mad or sad, or confused? Then let them point to crayons or color swatches, or even draw it on paper. Then say now, if someone hurts your heart, what color do you think it turns? Let them answer this freely, okay, even if it's dark, like black or red. Then you can even ask if we forgive them and let God help us. What color do you think our heart becomes again? You see, what this does is. This opens the door to conversations about emotional healing in a way that kids get to use their imagination and our visual elements. Then finish it with this Forgiveness helps our hearts change color again back to peace and joy, and God can help us do that even when it's hard.
Speaker 1:So let's not forget who also might be sitting at your table and that might be your troubled teen, the ones that don't say much but are feeling so much. Right, hormones are real and emotions are high, and sometimes they just are mad or sad and they don't even know why. That doesn't make them broken, ladies, it makes them human, kind of like. We are every 28 days on our cycle, right, just saying so? Try saying something like this hey, I've noticed you seem a little off this week Mad, quiet, maybe even sad, and you might not even know why. And listen, that's okay. I just want you to know that you don't have to figure it all out alone. We can talk about this, we can pray, or we can even just sit. You're not a problem to fix you and talk about this. We can pray or we can even just sit. You're not a problem to fix, you're a person I love.
Speaker 1:Then follow up with something like you know, sometimes when we carry unforgiveness, I have found that, even if it's just heavy feelings, we think ignoring it will make it go away, but usually it just builds up. You don't have to carry that stuff alone and I'm here when you're ready. You can even offer them a journal or safe space or place to write, draw or even vent Something private between them and God. If they don't want to talk yet and here's a teachable moment straight from mom this is always a great one to do at the table, so they get to experience and see you as a human being as well. And maybe you say something like this you know what guys?
Speaker 1:Mommy had to forgive someone today too. I was driving and someone cut me off and I got so mad I wanted to yell, even give him the universal hand wave, but instead I asked God to help me forgive them, because you know, I don't know what kind of day they might be having. Maybe they're rushing to the hospital, or maybe they're just late for a Chick-fil-A milkshake. Either way, praying helped me calm down and it helped me breathe again. That's the power of prayer. It shifts our focus from what someone did to us to what God can do in us. So let's ask ourselves is there anyone and this is you guys at the table again is there anyone we need to forgive today, at school, at home or even right here at this table, let's say a prayer together. And because listen when we pray and I want you to emphasize this because when we pray, when we bring forgiveness into our prayer life, we don't just let go, we let God in. That's where the peace comes from, that's where the healing begins.
Speaker 1:Ladies, let forgiveness be a part of your daily rhythm, not just a reaction. Make it a family culture, not just a personal struggle. Daily and in the moment, prayers for forgiveness. So here's the truth Forgiveness doesn't have to wait until bedtime, and these are things you want to emphasize with your kids. It doesn't have to wait until bedtime prayers your bedtime prayers is what I mean or when you finally calm down. You and your kids can talk to God right now, in the moment, on the playground, in school, in the hallway, during a car ride or even while someone is still hurting your feelings. These are important things to emphasize with your kids. You want to teach them that you don't have to wait to get home, to get it off your chest. What you want to do is you want to get it to God right away and right then and right there.
Speaker 1:Now, for the little ones, it's easy to remember, to say out loud or whisper to God this is what you could tell them, like things like Jesus, help me not to be mad. I want to forgive like you or God, take this yucky feeling. I don't want to keep it. Or help my heart. Be kind, even when people aren't.
Speaker 1:Now for your strong-willed, emotional or hurting teens that are real and raw, here are some prayers that they can shout out to God. Listen, god, I'm mad, you see it. Help me not stay stuck here, jesus, help me, let go before it eats me up. Or I don't feel like forgiving, but I choose to try. Meet me in the trying, and here are prayers for both you and your kids to pray together. This is great.
Speaker 1:God, help me forgive like you. Do Not because they deserve it, because I need the freedom. Jesus, heal what I can't fix. Help me let go of what hurts, even when I don't feel ready. Holy Spirit, fill the places where bitterness has been. I choose peace. You can even write one of these on a sticky note and put it in a backpack, a lunchbox or a mirror, mama, anywhere they'll see it in the middle of their day.
Speaker 1:Because, listen, forgiveness isn't just something we learn. It is something we live out moment by moment, one prayer at a time. So, as I close, my hope is that your greatest takeaway today is that forgiveness is not a weakness. It is a spiritual strength. It doesn't erase the past. It releases its hold on your future, though. It's not about excusing the offense. It's about choosing your own freedom. It's your choice whether you want to be a prisoner to to it or live as you are free. Indeed, listen, my friends, you can flourish, but not while your hands are full of bitterness. You got to let it go, girl, and watch God grow something new.
Speaker 1:If you need prayer or someone to walk with you in this season of unforgiveness, call 24-7 our prayer line at 855-822-PRAY. We are here to help you get through some unforgiveness, girl, and on to your healing. Until next time, walk in grace, live in truth and remember. It's a single mom thing, but it doesn't have to be the thing that stops you. Thanks for listening to. It's a Single Mom Thing. I hope you enjoyed our time together. If you have more questions on how to have a relationship with Jesus or need prayer. Visit us at wwwshepherdsvillagecom. Backslash prayer For more information and resources. Check out our show notes.
