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It's A Single Mom Thing
Welcome to “It's A Single Mom Thing,” the show for single moms by single moms, hosted by Sherry Chandler.
Being a solo momma and present parent is hard work, and losing focus is easy when you forget your faith. The good news is you are not alone. You were singled out this season, and together, we can work on what’s not working for you—finding Christ in the crisis! Whether you’re tuning in early in the morning or late at night, I’m here for you, momma.
This podcast is your go-to space for navigating life as a single mom with faith, fun, and a fresh perspective. We'll cover everything from mastering a single-mom success mindset and budgeting like a boss to prioritizing self-care and raising resilient kids. We’ll share time management hacks, parenting perspectives, co-parenting challenges, and how to find joy and laugh again. Together, we’ll move from surviving to thriving in every season of single motherhood.
Be encouraged. Get inspired. You can do this, momma.
Each Monday, join me for practical advice, relatable stories, and uplifting conversations as we walk this journey from solo momma to solo momma. I promise not to take too much of your time, and I’m so grateful you’re spending it with me.
It may be a single mom thing, but it doesn’t have to be the "single thing" that stops you!
It's A Single Mom Thing
Finding Love When Love Looks Different
🎙️ Finding Joy When Love Looks Different 💖
Feeling the Valentine’s Day blues? Struggling with love after a breakup, divorce, or toxic relationship? You’re not alone, Queen! In this episode of It’s a Single Mom Thing, we’re flipping the script on love and discovering how to embrace joy when love looks different than expected.
💡 What You’ll Learn:
✅ Why grief, loneliness, and frustration are normal—but not the end of your story
✅ How to recognize red flags vs. green flags in dating (because settling isn’t an option!)
✅ How to find love in unexpected places—faith, friendships, kids, and even new experiences
âś… The mindset shift that will help you step into a season of confidence and fulfillment
🚨 Plus, we’re playing a Red Flag or Green Flag Dating Game to help sharpen your relationship radar!
đź“– Scripture Encouragement: Romans 8:38-39 | Psalm 34:18 | Isaiah 43:4
👑 Challenge: Love isn’t just something you wait for—it’s something you create. What’s one way you can experience love in a new form this season?
🔗 Tune in now and let’s find joy—together. 🎧
It's a Single Mom Thing, Not the Single Thing That Stops You!
Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for single moms by single moms. This is Sherri, your host, and I am happy you are here today. Remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you.
Speaker 2:Welcome back to another episode of it's a Single Mom Thing. So if, like me, you've ever found yourself feeling a little meh about love whether it's because of a breakup, a toxic relationship or just watching another Valentine's Day roll around while scrolling through everyone else's perfect love stories then this episode is for you. So why this topic? Well, love doesn't always look like we thought it would. Love doesn't always look like we thought it would. Whether you're newly single, divorced, healing or just tired of waiting, this season can bring up all kinds of emotions. But here's the good news Just because love looks different doesn't mean it's gone. Love is still here, and today we're going to talk about how to see it, embrace it and walk confidently in it. So here's what you can expect today We'll name the hard stuff, because, listen, pretending doesn't help. We'll reframe what love actually is Hint, it's not just about romance. And we'll play a little game of red flag or green flag, because, listen, dating today can be wild and we need to talk about it. And then, finally, we'll wrap up with a powerful shift in how we can experience love moving forward. So grab your coffee, put in your earbuds or keep driving that minivan. We're about to dig in deep girl what we're feeling when love doesn't look like you expected. So let's be real.
Speaker 2:Nobody enters into a relationship thinking, oh I hope this crashes and burns. I mean, I certainly don't remember divorce being something I said I do to when I stood at the altar, nor the woman listening who said in sickness and health and then it took her loved one away too soon. How we got there is different for each of us, but we do share these common feelings when love looks different. Grief I thought we'd grow old together, but now I'm here and he's not. Loneliness Everyone else seems to have someone, but what about me? Frustration I did the work, I gave my best and now I have to start over. Comparison it just feels like everyone on my feed is getting engaged or celebrating anniversaries or temptation to settle. Maybe he's not perfect, but at least I won't be alone.
Speaker 2:Do you find yourself saying one of these things as Valentine's Day approaches? Here's the reality check. One, being single is better than being in the wrong relationship. I mean, we are single parents and in most cases that process of how we got there to be a single parent was painful. Just saying do you really want to go through that all over again now with someone who isn't even your kiddo's father. Two there's no love more damaging than the kind you force yourself into just to avoid being alone. You see, if the door is shut, don't waste your time and those pretty fingernails trying to open a door that was meant to remain closed. Three, and this is the best reality check God's love never leaves even when people do so.
Speaker 2:Here's a little scripture drop for you Romans 8, 38 through 39, and I'm going to paraphrase this Nothing can separate us from the love of God. Psalms 34, 18,. God is close to the brokenhearted Ladies. You are deeply loved, not just someday when the right person comes along, but right now, today, in this very moment, as we speak with one another, as we go through this podcast. Listen, we will discover and uncover, maybe in ways you have forgotten, that you are loved or can even experience love. But before we do, I want us to have a little fun together and do something I've never done before on this podcast, and that's play a game with you called red flag or green flag. It's a dating game. I'll throw out a dating scenario and then you decide in your head or out loud in your car Is this a red flag or a green flag? Is this a red flag or a green flag? Now, listen, I want you to have some fun with this, to the point that the person in the car next to you has some serious questions. So here's the first set of scenarios in texting and communication. He only texts quote WYD, end quote late at night and never makes real plans. Okay, I did say that we were going to have a little bit of fun here, so stick with me. Okay, number two he texts you good morning and good night every day, but hasn't taken you on an actual date. Oh, that's a red flag. And number three he responds consistently and communicates clearly, without making you guess where you stand. Yeah, that boy needs to get a hand clap. Okay, our next set of scenarios and faith and values. He says he believes in God but doesn't think church is necessary. Oh, you need to throw baby out with the bathwater right there. That's a total red flag. He prays with you before meals and talks about his relationship with God. Oh, yes, that's a green. That's a go. He asked you to go to church before he asked you to Netflix and chill. Okay, wait a minute. He said what he asked you to go to church before he asked you to Netflix and chill. Okay, wait a minute. He said what he asked you to go to church before he asked you to Netflix and chill. He better not be asking you to Netflix and chill either. So I'm going to say that's a red. Okay, that boo was, because what he was talking about is a total boo.
Speaker 2:Okay, next section kids and family. He tells you he wants to wait before meeting your kids and respects your decisions to take things slow. Oh, yes, you get a green, go. He never introduces you to his friends and has no interest in meeting yours. Oh, you can take that red and go. He introduces you to his kids on the second date. Uh, no Red flag.
Speaker 2:Okay, here's where it's going to get a little hot and steamy here. Yes, we're going to go to sex, intimacy and commitment scenarios. He makes sexual jokes early on, even after you expressed you're not comfortable with it. Oh, that's a red flag. He says let's take things slow, baby. But after six months he still won't call you his girlfriend. Oh, you got to go to. That's a red flag. I hope you, girl, you're going to kick that boy out the door. Let's see. He openly talks about waiting for sex until marriage and respects your stance on intimacy. Well, that's a green light. And where do we find one of those kind of guys? That's a green flag, not a green light. Okay.
Speaker 2:Next scenario control and manipulation. He tells you baby, I just don't want to see you get hurt. But starts isolating you from your friends and family. Red flag he gets mad if you have guy friends, but he, he has plenty of female friends for himself. Red flag he guilt trips you for having standards and says you're too picky, that's why you're single. Oh, you're lucky if that's. All you get is a red flag from me. So listen, ladies, I hope you had some fun. You did a great job. You did a great job.
Speaker 2:So here's a few takeaways that you can take with you. Some red flags are obvious, but some they're just sneaky. You need to trust your gut, A good man. He will bring peace, not confusion, and you should have faith, not fear, when you're dating a man. Now, if you got a little check in your spirit about someone you are dating who is seriously waving a lot of red flags, even though it's painful, you may want to move on from this partner or at least, at the very least girl, talk to someone about these red flags whom you trust.
Speaker 2:Again, this statement bears repeating. Being single is better than being in the wrong relationship and possibly keeping you from the right one, Embracing love in a new way. If love is more than romance, where else is it showing up in your life and how can you simply love it? So let's look around. Number one you'll find love in your kids. So maybe this Valentine's Day you can plan a special outing, write them notes, make them their favorite meal, create a new tradition or do something they love to do or something so unexpected. You'll find love in your friendships. So, girls, schedule some time with your friends who pour into you Breakfast, lunch or tea time, Watch a funny flick, catch a sunset or pop some tags at the thrift store.
Speaker 2:Number three the greatest love, and that's your love for God. Spend time in prayer, Listen for his voice, Lean into his love, Start a new Bible study, Write in your Thriving 25 journal insight he gives you in quiet time together, Look for him in nature. He is all around you, girl, and get down to a worship song. Number four, and here's one that often gets overlooked, and that's simply love for yourself. What if you took yourself on a date, set some boundaries or even spoke life over yourself? And number four and I'm going to throw this one in love for a new experience.
Speaker 2:Try something you've always wanted to do. You see, love doesn't have to come in the way of the form of a person, it can come from an experience. Take that pottery class. Book the solo weekend trip, train for the 5k. Start that side hustle or creative project you've always wanted to do. Go to a concert, try a new restaurant, or explore a hobby that simply just brings you joy. So do something you always wanted to do or said you would do and you didn't. Even if you do it, scared girl, you're doing it with him, meaning Jesus.
Speaker 2:So here's my challenge to you. I want you to think about this. So what would it feel like if you started living like you're already deeply loved Because you are Got it? So what would that feeling look like on you? Would it say content, confident, peace, trust or even joy? Would you stand up straighter, Talk to people you normally wouldn't talk to? Would you take more risk, Laugh with your kids more, Look people in the eye or even smile at a stranger? And here's what's strange when you find love and people and places and experiences, you actually begin to start loving your life, even as a single parent. And here is my best guess. And that's when you learn to love yourself right where you are. Here is my best guess. And that's when you learn to love yourself right where you are, Either the right guy comes along or you may even forget about finding a guy because you're having fun finding yourself. And here's another scripture drop for you, and that's Isaiah 43, 4. You are precious and honored in my sight and I love you.
Speaker 2:As I close, here are a few final thoughts of encouragement to take into your week and rock out this Valentine's Day and, well, every day. Number one love isn't just coming, it's already here. Two God's love is constant and you are already enough, is constant and you are already enough. And three no more settling. No more second guessing your worth Dust settles, you don't. So here is my CTA to you and that's call to action.
Speaker 2:Number one it's a journal challenge. So get that Thriving 25 journal out and write down three ways love is already showing up in your life today and I want you to thank God for each and every one of them. Number two tag you are it. Tag me at at SV-Moms on Insta or, if you're on the it's a Single Mom Thing private Facebook group, and share your biggest takeaway from this episode. And three I want you to share this episode. Listen, if this episode has encouraged you, you need to send it to another single mom who needs it before this Valentine's Day. Okay, so, mama, be gone and be done with the Valentine's Day blue for this girl knows what to do, she experiences and finds her joy even when love looks differently.
Speaker 2:Have a wonderful week and a happy Galentine's Day, remembering it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you.
Speaker 1:Thanks for listening to it's a. Single Mom Thing. I hope you enjoyed our time together. If you have more questions on how to have a relationship with Jesus or need prayer, visit us at wwwshepherdsvillagecom. Backslash prayer. For more information and resources, check out our show notes.
