It's A Single Mom Thing
Welcome to “It's A Single Mom Thing”, the show for single moms by single moms.
Being a solo momma and present parent is hard work and it’s easy to lose your focus when you forget your faith. The good news is, that you are not alone, you were singled out in this season, and together we can work on what’s not working for you finding Christ in the crisis! Whether you are listening early in the morning or late at night, we are here for you!
Be encouraged. Get inspired. You can do this, momma.
Stay tuned as each Monday we will feature fresh and fun content and conversations as we join you on this journey from solo momma to solo momma. We promise not to take too much of your time and thank you for spending it with us. It may be a single mom thing, but it doesn’t have to be the single thing that stops you!
It's A Single Mom Thing
Overdrawn, Just Not Overcooked
In this lighthearted yet deeply reflective episode of It’s a Single Mom Thing, we dive into life’s latest storms and the clean-up they leave behind, exploring what it means to feel “overdrawn” but not overdone. Inspired by the idea that we come into this world with nothing and leave with nothing, we ask: what if we could leave something meaningful behind?
We’ll discuss what it feels like to be “spent” like a $20 bill and how, even in brokenness, there’s beauty to be found and a chance to build something lasting. We’ll also talk about how to rise above feeling emotionally or financially overdrawn and find renewed purpose in what we’re passing down to the next generation.
So, what storm are you in right now? What lesson is waiting for you to learn, laugh at, and leave behind as a firm foundation for your kiddos?
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It's a Single Mom Thing, Not the Single Thing That Stops You!
Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for single moms by single moms. This is Sherri, your host, and I am happy you are here today. Remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you. Welcome back my solo peeps to another episode of it's a Single Mom Thing, the show where we laugh and let go working out what isn't working for us.
Speaker 1:So, as I pondered and prayed what to speak about today, this thought of being overdrawn continues to dance in my head. So, over the course of the last week, I have had the privilege to meet with several Sola Mamas who, in the aftermath of the recent storms, I have found this common thread. Aftermath of the recent storms, I have found this common thread, a thread so thin but yet so strong that it left me in knots. Indeed, many of heartstrings were pulled in many directions as the storms of recent tugged on them, leaving them frayed like the fringe on the hem of a good old pair of denim jeans, whether it was the tears and fears felt, pulling on the string of unpredictability and uncertainty of what was to come next, or the winds of change that the hurricane brought with it you may be one of those listening who lost their job or their income, that went out to sea like the storm surge. Or perhaps you're one whose plans of a home that were being built have been put on pause, not sure if that front door will ever be opened, whether you were a single mom who lost much, or you know of someone who once had much, now left with nothing much. There was this common thread that I noticed that we all have in the wake of these storms, and that's this we may be overdrawn, but we are not overcooked, spent like a $20 bill. So you know me if you've been tracking with me for a while. You know I am no stranger to a good play on words.
Speaker 1:So, in light of the storms and the cleanup that they have left behind, I try to make light of this situation, not to dishonor the lessons or the pain they bring with them, but rather the possibility to laugh, let go and live again. For me, these storms have reminded me we came into this world with nothing and we too will leave with nothing. But what if we could leave something behind, something behind for the next generation to build upon, that could be their firm foundation. These are the places my heart goes, when pricked by pain and possibility at the same time. Your life like mine. Well, it may have been drawn out with the perfect design like an Etch-A-Sketch. Then suddenly something shakes it up and all the lines are all but blurred or even gone. But something I have found with these set of storms is that we may be overdrawn, but we're not overcooked, and here's what I mean by this. Sure, there were, and there still are, tears and fears, as this brought many of us to our knees. We also find ourselves living with this new diagnosis called hurricane fatigue, leaving us spent like a $20 bill. But what I have found most redeeming and endearing in this time of uncertainty is the certainty that we will build again. There is hope and a future, and that community it does exist, and it is something that we both desire and were created for.
Speaker 1:Through the storm, I have found many of walls torn down. There are, of course, the physical walls that once housed and sheltered people, but more impactful are the walls that have come down, housing one's spirit, no matter the income levels. That once separated us. This wall was level two. Separated us. This wall was level two. Never have I seen a community more alive than after a storm that threatened to kill us. Well, I kind of digress a little bit. I have seen this once before, and it was on September 11th 2001. Our country that we thought was impenetrable was penetrated. Country that we thought was impenetrable was penetrated. Our security that we once had filled us with insecurity. As a nation, we grieved, we wept together, but we also came together through the power of pain, as the walls came down for all of us that day. If only they stayed down. I tend to wonder if these storms were meant to unite us once again. Sure, we were overdrawn then, yes, but we weren't overcooked either.
Speaker 1:Beauty in the brokenness, in driving down the beach road I travel every Sunday after church service. I find that the road is the same, but yet it is different. The ocean views that once took my breath away are replaced by the view in my rearview mirror, now taking my breath away, seeing all the scars left behind. You know, if I have to be honest with you, it brings me to overwhelming tears every time I drive down that road. Now you might be asking yourself so why even drive down it? And this is why I do it.
Speaker 1:I do it so as not to forget. Never to forget how prayers were answered. Never to forget the posture of total surrender. Never to forget that there is always someone who has it tougher than you. Never to forget that there is always someone to serve that is way better than yourself. Never to forget that his promises are true, as he will never leave us or forsake us. I do it to bless every house, every beachfront view that used to bless me in my time of pain. Now it is my turn to return the gift that has been given to me. I do it as a reminder to always keep my heart open to his plans, his purposes, and to keep community first place in my heart, even when the walls go back up rebuilding it.
Speaker 1:It is a scar I want to be reminded of. So when it heals, heals. I don't forget where we have come from and the feeling of this moment. Yes, the landscape is scarred, shattered and tattered, but soon it will look much different, as it too heals. Much like our hearts after a divorce, death or separation, that scarred, they too will heal. Our memories, for now may be much like the furniture all over the littered beach lawns, in full view for everyone to see, leaving us vulnerable. That's how we feel at the start of our solo journey. Yes, everything that we once knew or found comfort in now may be a source of discomfort, but take heart, there is beauty in the brokenness and I see it as I drive down my favorite beach road and my solo peeps. There is beauty in your brokenness too.
Speaker 1:At the start of my solo journey, I was in pieces like a jar, shattered all over the floor. So many pieces, scattered in many directions, some so small you couldn't even see them. Just like you may be feeling right now. I know that kind of pain, those kind of scars, that kind of emptiness and uncertainty. Your life lived out in fragments of who you once were, even as the best self-proclaimed control freak. There was no stopping the pieces that had to be broken, that had to come to the end of oneself so that it could be pieced back together by the one who knitted me and my mother's womb. Pieced back together by the one who knitted me in my mother's womb, pieced back together into a sherry that is unrecognizable and far more beautiful than the image I used to see in the mirror. I know this to be true, as I love who I see in the mirror, for I weathered the storm with the one who commands the wind and the wind obeys him.
Speaker 1:One mom who I was speaking to the other day said it this way my eyes look different from day one of divorce. My eyes are the window to my soul and for a time they were once lost. She went as far as to show me proof, as she showed me the ages and stages of photos of her eyes after the shattering of divorce to the beauty she has found in the brokenness. It was an eye-opening experience, to say the least. Ladies and gents, this I can say with assurance. For all the storms I have endured as a solo as there were far too many to name I can now say it was all worth it.
Speaker 1:At the beginning of my journey, if you told me that I would have to go through what I needed to go through to get where he wanted to take me, oh, I know my competitive spirit would have arm wrestled God for another way, but it is through the storm where he wanted to take me, although, if I'm honest, it was my decision to create the storm. But take heart when you find your beauty and the boldness of who you become in him, through him and with him. You can't find that kind of beauty in a bottle Getting over the overdrawn. So my encouragement for you today is how to get over the overdrawn so not to overspend your account. Honestly, I think it is to extend yourself the grace to simply go through it rather than just get over it. I know there are many who would say, well, why don't you just build a bridge and get over it? I have heard this many of times growing up and at times I think it actually stunned my growth. I mean, if life were just that easy that we could build a bridge to get over the gaping gap that a bridge crosses over, then all you would ever do is cross back and forth over something really never moving forward, over something that never healed. Sometimes and this is just my opinion I tend to think you have to go through it to really get over it. The key is what you do through that time of being overdrawn, so you also don't withdraw either. I think you have to first come to the place of honoring the situation, the person and or other situationship, while also honoring yourself, allowing yourself, giving yourself permission to be exactly where God knows you are, and let him meet you there, let him stand in the gap for you to get you to the other side, from overdrawn to overcomer.
Speaker 1:In last week's podcast, we explored John 16, 33. That says I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace in this world. You will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome this world To explore the road we traveled with. On that verse, I would encourage you to listen to last week's podcast titled here in the Heart. Today, though, however, as we look forward with hope, we look to verse Isaiah 43, 18 through 19 in the ESV, and it says Remember not the former things, nor consider things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing. Now it springs forth. Do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers, in the desert. Whenever I'm in a struggle to let go of something, I hold on to this verse.
Speaker 1:The Lord is constantly reminding us, his people, not to dwell on our past, whatever we are trying to let go of, that relationship, that addiction, that property, that loss that was suffered, whatever it may be. If we look towards him and meditate on his words and his promises that he will take care of whatever we are going through and he will make a way for us, just like in Jeremiah 29, 11, which states For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and hope. Many people don't realize that this was spoken to the people of Israel at one of the lowest points in their history. Most people focus on the bad in a situation. It is part of our wiring and self-preservation to ensure that we protect ourselves from harm. However, the Lord says that if we just look towards him, we will see the new things he's doing. He wants to open our eyes to him. We will see the new things he's doing. He wants to open our eyes to him. We can't focus on what he's doing in our lives if we're not looking towards him.
Speaker 1:This, my little peeps, this is how I have gotten through the overdrawn, never finding myself overcooked, although there were times when I said stick a fork in me. I am done as I close, no matter where in me. I am done as I close no matter where you find yourself. In this podcast, I hope that you find that is in him that gets you through it. You've heard it before You're either getting ready to go into a storm, you're in a storm or you're coming out of one Now.
Speaker 1:I'm not a fan of storms by any means, but I do know there's purpose in them. There are showers of blessings coming and puddles to be jumped in. Some leave visible scars and some scars remain unseen, but they all have a purpose. Just look at the scars on Jesus' hands. Take heart. If you know the one who commands the wind and the wind obeys him, your belief will be the relief you need to get through all the storms. Overdrawn, just not overcooked and guys, you know is tough stuff and not always something easy to talk about. My hope and my prayer is that you find this place, this podcast, your safe space where, as a community, we weather the storms of life together.
Speaker 1:Being a solo is not an easy job, but being a parent is the blessed job you'll ever have. What storm are you in right now? What lesson is there for you to learn? That you can leave behind Something for the next generation possibly your kiddos to build upon that could be their firm foundation? Are you feeling both overdrawn and overcooked and need someone to talk to? We are here for you, day or night. You are never alone. Call us at 855-822-PRAY. We'd love to be your lifeline in the storm. Have a wonderful week and remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you. Thanks for listening to. It's a Single Mom Thing. I hope you enjoyed our time together. If you have more questions on how to have a relationship with Jesus or need prayer, visit us at wwwshepherdsvillagecom. Backslash prayer. For more information and resources, check out our show notes.