It's A Single Mom Thing

A Love Like That. You Will Rise Again.

Shepherd's Village Season 4 Episode 9

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When the foundation of a two-decade marriage crumbles on the eve of its 20th anniversary, the ensuing chasm of love loss and identity crisis is profound. Embark on a heart-wrenching journey with us as we unravel the emotional tapestry of a wife and mother faced with the shock of divorce, navigating through the debris of shattered dreams and a life once intertwined with another. Our conversation traverses the broader societal shift towards late-in-life divorces, acknowledging the pain of both men and women as families reconfigure and single parents emerge. This episode is a raw and honest look at the struggle to rediscover oneself amidst the echoes of a love that was meant to endure.

As the narrative unfolds, we find solace in the promise of new beginnings and the power of unfailing love. Just as the story of Easter delivers hope through the resurrection, we draw parallels to the possibility of personal rebirth after the despair of lost love. With an eye towards our 100th episode, coinciding with Easter Sunday, we delve into the transformative love of Jesus and its capacity to guide us through life's valleys. Offering resources for spiritual growth and support for those traversing the difficult path of divorce, this episode stands as an invitation to rise from the ashes of heartbreak and embrace the dawn of a new chapter.

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It's a Single Mom Thing, Not the Single Thing That Stops You!

Speaker 1:

Welcome to it's a Single Mom Thing, the show for single moms by single moms. This is Sherry, your host, and I am happy you are here today. Remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you Now. Picture this You've been married 19 years. Your stay at home mom, have two fabulous kids, now teenagers. You have dedicated your life and your savings to your husband's emerging career, cooked countless meals, kept a tidy house and everyone healthy. You host dinner parties for people you didn't know and don't care to know, aka your husband's work family. You make sure your family has everything they need and think very little of your own. One week before your platinum 20th wedding anniversary, you'll wonder to yourself is this the year that he surprises me with the romantic vacation for two? I have been waiting and we have been saving for On the day your marriage turns 20, you make sure the house is extra specially kept, as you are too.

Speaker 1:

You put on your best dress and your best face as soon you will be face to face with the love of your life. Excited, you hear a car door shut, taking notice that your husband has come home early for work while the kids are out with friends, you peek outside the window and notice that he quickly turns around, as it appears he has forgotten something. As he heads back towards his car, you gleefully think to yourself why he never comes home early, and certainly never before the kids. Oh, I know, he remembered, I am certain of it. You cheerfully sigh. Oh, I just love my man. And to think I have 20 or more years with him. Oh, yes, girl, yes. As he grabs the door handle, you grab a quick peek and look in the mirror as you check out your dress and your lips. Excitedly, he walks through the door, takes a step closer to you and, with an immense expression of passion on his face, you close your eyes as you wait for the words to roll off his lips, softly touching yours. There's a long pause, a sigh, a faint smell of your favorite cologne, the warmth of his breath and the vibration of his words that tickle your neck I want a divorce. Brother, say what? Yes, I want a divorce. I'm not happy and I don't love you anymore. Husband say what I have spent the last 20 years of my life For what A love like that.

Speaker 1:

Welcome to another episode of it's a Single Mom Thing. Yes, girl, yes. All too often, as of lately. This is the cry I have heard from an emerging group of single mothers, many who are close in age to me, who now find themselves in this single situation and, to be fair, it is a cry that isn't necessarily gender bias, as it is now happening to husbands too, as we have noticed more single fathers in our divorce care classes than ever before. No matter how the relationship ends and the single situation begins, it is heart-breaking to witness the devastating hurt from a love like that, especially when it happens before the next season of life. You know the one when the birds prepare to fly the nest and you are preparing to be in an empty one with your spouse Love Loss.

Speaker 1:

If you have been tracking with me for the last 99 episodes, you may have noticed there are many crooked paths that have led to one person becoming a single parent, all sharing the same feelings as they experience love loss. Not just love loss for the relationship, whether married or not, but a love loss for the person you were once in love with, the life you had and the one you now don't want. Love loss for even friends or family that were once tied to you as a part of your wedding knot, the co-workers you hosted, opening your heart and home too, the things you once enjoyed to do with your family, and the few occasions alone with your spouse, even the church and church family you shared your life and many memories with. As you sit in the pew alone. And, yes, a love loss of the greatest love and relationship you have ever known. Jesus. You love nothing and no one, possibly not even yourself.

Speaker 1:

Love loss for a love like that, it is easy to quickly backside and become bitter, developing a root of disdain, despair, hate, jealousy and judgment for all those around you. You did everything right, but yet life seemed to go wrong for you your friends who are still married planning upcoming graduations and vacations, while you sit at home writing a short resume, trying to stand apart amongst other applicants your age or even younger, not sure how you're going to pay for a graduation party or where you soon will live as he gets the marital home. You have love loss and not sure if you ever want it back. Love finds a way, dear friends. You may have love loss, but love hasn't lost you. No matter where in the hurt you are, you need to know he is there with you, sitting right beside you For some of you listening, the love loss may be so great that you don't even feel him, and that is perfectly normal. Know that where you are is normal, and so are you.

Speaker 1:

You, my sweet friend, have experienced a great loss and a life you were so certain would continue on, now coming to an abrupt stop without your participation or solicitation. Much like the physical death of a loved one, a part of you too has also died. The feelings are the same, although the situation is different, but you will rise again. Ahead of you is time you will need to spend grieving the loss of once was, but it will be time well spent. You will rise again. There is an awkward pleasure that awaits you as you uncover and discover the purpose in this pain that is preparing you. You will rise again. There is a strength that walks on with you as you continue on the straight and narrow path with a partner that has never left your side nor will leave you. You will rise again, much like on Friday. Your Sunday is coming. Sunday is coming. A great light dawns in Galilee.

Speaker 1:

Some say madman, some say king, wonder-working rebel priest, jesus Christ the Nazarene. He knew well what it would take to free us all from sin and grave, a perfect man would have to die, and only he could pay that price. Friday's good cause Sunday is coming. Don't lose hope. Cause, sunday is coming. Devil, you're done. You better start running Friday's good cause. Sunday is coming. So he let those soldiers take him in as his friend betrayed him with a kiss there before the mocking crowd, like a lamb to the slaughter, didn't make a sound. Then he carried that cross to Calvary and he shed his blood to set us free. As the nails went in and the sky went dark, the redemption of the world was on his heart. Friday's good cause Sunday is coming. Don't lose hope. Cause Sunday is coming. Devil, you're done. You better start running Friday's good cause. Sunday is coming.

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Then he breathed his last and bowed his head. The son of God and a man was dead, with bloody hands, tears on their face. They laid him down inside that grave. But that wasn't the end. That wasn't the end. That wasn't the end. Let me tell you what happened next.

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The women came before the dawn to find that stone already gone. When they looked inside, the angels said why you looking for the living among the dead? He's alive. He's alive, hallelujah. He's alive. Give him praise, lift him high, hallelujah, he is alive. He is alive. He is alive. Hallelujah, he is alive. Give him praise, lift him high. Hallelujah, he is alive. Hallelujah, hallelujah. Don't lose hope, cause Sunday is coming. Hallelujah, hallelujah. Now Jesus reigns upon the throne. All the heaven sings to him alone. We watch and wait, like a bride for a groom. Oh, church, arise, he is coming soon.

Speaker 1:

If you are familiar with these words, you know they are lyrics from well-known Christian artist Phil Wickham. I did you a solid by not singing them to you. You are welcome, but they are not Phil's words either per se. He's just retelling the greatest story, the greatest love story that continues to be told. My single peeps, if you are his, your Sunday is coming. You will rise again. Because he has risen.

Speaker 1:

Love found a way to conquer death, to conquer your sin, to conquer your divorce, to conquer your love loss, to conquer your bitterness. Love wins and love will breathe new life back into you, even after the death of your marriage. You may have my sister may have spent the last 20 years for a love like that, but you have a worry and pain. Free eternity ahead of you. Oh yes, with Jesus who loves you like that. Do you have questions about Good Friday and the Sunday that is coming, easter, call us at 855-822-Pray and learn more about the gift of love that awaits you. Dive deeper in some inspiration and information, taking an e-course on what's the big deal about Jesus. Visit us at Shepard's Village University by visiting sb-universityorg Looking for a divorce care support group near you. Visit divorcecareorg and, of course, come back this Easter Sunday for our 100th episode and some special love that awaits you from my friends at Indian Rocks Christian School. Have a wonderful week and remember it's a single mom thing and not the single thing that stops you.